Polite Paradise

Well, he got very huffy. He told me that we were supposed to get messages for him and call him to tell him that people were calling for him! He said our not doing so had cost him a lot of business due to lost patients.

Wow. That is just...wow. 

I received a wrong number text today!

The entire content of it was "Whts up".

No punctuation. A missing letter A.

I do not recognize the number- though it is from my area code. I looked it up- and it gave conflicting results (listed a couple people as having it).

Needless to say, I did not reply.

I worked for a government agency, back in the pre-caller ID days. I handled phone calls that had to be taken care of immediately. Therefore, I only gave out the central reception number, so if I was unavailable, the receptionist could send the caller to my backup. If the receptionist knew I was in, he or she would tell the caller my name and transfer the call. There were a small number of people who had my direct number, who would, of course, know who I was. So, I always answered my phone with "Hello. this is Nutrax For Nerves." No other identifying information.

The state corrections department sent a notice to every police dept. in the US with the number to call to see if someone had a warrant out for arrest due to a parole violation. They put my direct number on the notice. I started getting calls from people checking warrants. I was amazed at how many never stopped to verify that they had called the right number, when I answered with only my name, not my agency or unit identification. Even worse, they would start spouting personal information. "I have John Smith here. His social Security Number is xxx-xx-xxxx. His drivers license number is 1234567. He last known address is..." Even when I'd start yelling "No! Stop! Wrong number! Don't tell me this!" it often took the callers a while to cease their spiel.

What was worse, I couldn't find the correct number to give callers, much less a number to call to get it corrected. The corrections agency only had a few public numbers, that were always answered with "leave a message and we'll get back to you." They never got back to me.

I finally got it resolved a couple of months later when I happened to be chatting with a coworker and mentioned how frustrated I was. "Hey, my husband works for corrections. They are awful about public calls, due to too many cranks and death threats. I'll ask him to check the internal phone book." Coworker returned with the contact number. The person I called was appropriately concerned and apologetic, and gave me the right warrants number, which was a couple of numbers off from mine. Two days later, I was informed that a new notice went out with all sorts of corrections in giant type. Never got another call.

Here are a few wrong physical address stories:

- At my old apartment in my current city, I started receiving fantasy football mail for somebody by the name of "Raoul Nail". This was after my having lived in this apartment for at least 3 years. I did receive some bank statements for someone with the same first name (did not record on LJ if the same surname as well) when I first moved there, but they stopped before I had been there an entire year.

- At the apartment I lived in Cowford for 2 years, most of the wrongly addressed mail was for a woman named Linda. But I did receive a few National Geographic magazines for a Cassandra as well. And random things for a few other people.

- My parents purchased their first house (not the Hoggetowne one) on or before 1975. Well, sometime between August 1991 and June 1995 (it happened during my high school years), I picked up the mail one day and there was a letter addressed to a "Mario Lopez". It was from some local department- power, water, housing, phone, or something like that. At first, I simply assumed the department had written the house number wrong, and that this was for a new neighbor I had not met yet. Well, my folks enlightened me! "Mario Lopez" was the previous owner of the house! Whatever agency it was had NOT updated their records in nearly 20 years!!!

I received a wrong number today that provoked an emotion other than laughter.

A caller from Illinois asked for "Joshua Jackson" (similar name of similar style). In other words- certainly not me. I told her she had the wrong number and asked her what she dialed. It was my cell phone number indeed.

Well, she asked me if anyone in the house was a Medicare recipient. I said no- that I had had this number for 15+ years and was nowhere near old enough for Medicare.

I suspect someone wrote the number incorrectly along the way due to misreading a digit.

I would usually wait a moment for an acknowledgement.  Anymore, I just don't pick up the phone if I don't recognize the number on the Caller ID.

Just remembered this obscene call that was extremely unlikely to be intended for me:

It was 1999. I was living with my parents.

The phone rang. I pick it up.

Me: Hello
Male voice: Hello
Me: Hello
Male voice: Hello
Me: Hi
Male voice: Hi how are you?
Me: I am fine. Who are you looking for?
Male voice: I am looking for a woman to talk to. Your voice is making me very hard.

I immediately hung up. My colleagues **** up when I told them the next day!!!

I got this one yesterday on my landline.

The phone rings. I see the number is from Los Angeles, CA- I live in Florida.

So out of curiosity, I decide to answer it.

A lady asks in Spanish if she can speak to “Azalea” (not the real name- will say why soon).

I tell her she has the wrong number. She apologized and ended the call. Then I chuckled.

I do have a distant relative with the name the caller asked for- but she does not share my surname, does not live in my state, and would have no reason to be called by someone from LA!